Chapter 4 personal reflections
1. How do I feel when a friend is experiencing success at weight loss? In general pretty happy for them though I do wonder where the motivation comes from. The second question asks why I want to ask someone to hold me accountable or why I do not want to ask someone to keep me accountable. I do not really want to bother anyone but I do have a friend that is encouraging. She goes to the gym any chance she can get and always sends me a text about her success. I usually send her an encouraging note back and even went and exercised one day (just once!) so I could let her know she is an encourager to me. We don’t really hold each other accountable but we are each other’s personal cheerleader.
As for further accountability…I suppose I could start posting me weight on the blog and give myself a weekly grade. My oldest came up with the idea of the weekly grade. He likes the idea of his teacher getting graded. I have also added PE to our homeschool schedule for next week. Our schedule…me too.
I am meant for more than this (struggle with emotional eating). I was not created to endure life with my black hole. This chapter is hard because it touched on my identity in Christ. My identity in Him is a truth I have struggled to understand and struggled to really accept. In my heart I feel like garbage. So many have thrown me away and I have accepted this lie as truth. You can’t hurt me when you toss me aside because I am garbage…meant to be tossed away. As I typed that out just now… I see the origins of my black hole. I am redeemed. I am not garbage. I will not throw myself away…anymore.
In this chapter Lysa says to insert my name into certain verses of the Bible. Adding my name to scripture is a fairly new concept for me. Last month I received a beautiful gift from Kimberly at A Planting of the Lord. This was my first experience of seeing my name inserted into scripture. I treasure this gift from Kimberly. The moment I read the first one it was like being embraced by Love…that is the only way I can describe the experience.
Chapter 6 Self Discipline
Every part of this chapter reminded me of my days in the Catholic Church. Just “offer it up.” If you are Catholic you know what that means. I have never heard a Protestant say that phrase. So if you have no understanding of that phrase just read this chapter. Lysa explains the spiritual art of self-discipline and self-control rather well. No hair-shirts required…praise Jesus! So, by denying myself unhealthy appetites I can grow closer to God. The physical sacrifice leads to spiritual growth and an opportunity to embrace my God instead of replace Him with the idol of food. The swirling mass of need in my soul can only be filled by Jesus, only Jesus.
Still not craving water…but it doesn’t taste as bad these days…I’m claiming it as a small victory!