Sometimes my dreams are vivid and so very real. Sometimes, when I first awaken, I cannot differentiate between dream and reality. It is a peculiar confusion that has happened to me since childhood. Maybe it is common to everyone.

Last week I had a dream so vivid that I thought it was reality when I first woke up. I dreamed we lived on a cliff. The rain turned our drive way into a stream and my van had sunk deep into the mud. We had very hungry goats. The rain washed away all the grass so they ate the van’s tires. My alarm woke me up for work. I placed my hand on my husband’s shoulder to wake him so he could take me to work since the goats ate the tires. I didn’t shake my husband awake because I realized that we didn’t own any goats nor live on a muddy cliff. The van still had tires. I could drive myself to work. I didn’t need to wake my beloved. I remember feeling rather confused for a fleeting moment as I floated between dreamland and reality. At least I figured it out before I woke my husband…

first year of home education

I also dreamed about my step grandfather. He died a long time ago. He was building a chair in his back yard. I was just watching him. He looked young like in pictures I had seen of him in his soldier’s uniform. He stopped working to visit with me and the sunshine was so bright and very warm. I don’t remember what we talked about but he was so happy. The dream was nice and I missed the warm sunshine when I woke up. He was a good cook too. He taught me to make potato soup so I made some for dinner. My soup never turns out as good as his though.

Oldest is learning to drive. He passed for his learner’s permit in November. My husband is teaching him and they usually go out for a Sunday drive. I let him drive to class last week and the experience wasn’t as hair raising as I expected. He is wrapping up his third quarter and we should be finishing up his sophomore year by early May. We’ll likely take a summer break this year since we’ll hopefully be moving into our new home round about that time. Or I will be completely done in attempting to move and finish the school year simultaneously.

Sparkles is considering going to high school next year. I’m not over joyed about it but have done my best to keep my opinion to myself. But since we are considering making another two-week trip out west, she doesn’t want a public school schedule interfering with anything fun. I can’t blame her for that. It is an easy decision between a road trip and public education. I’m fairly certain I will have two high school students next fall. Maybe three if Middle Boy wants to push through on his math.

The next few months will be full of decision making for the house as well as curriculum…My mind feels overwhelmed just considering it all.

We enjoyed a nice break at Great Wolf Lodge. It is a nice fun getaway especially when the weather turns cold.

We enjoy going to co-op but we skip it too. I just want to hibernate in the winter and hide until the sun shines again. My therapist believes I have seasonal affective disorder. I am sure she is right though I am not sure what caused my near panic attack in her office last week. She kept telling me I was safe until I calmed down. We tabled discussing that for another day and went on with the rest of our appointment.

Christmas was nice.

Other moments…

Middle Boy’s birthday

The house. Oldest worked on the plumbing for the basement level.