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yours truly, after a workout

This week’s chapter in Life’s Too Short to Eat Bad Cheese is about examining why I am not taking care of myself. Ellie‘s primary focus in this chapter is on emotional eating and discovering the root cause so we can all take proper care of the body God gave us. Another point she makes is that when I do not value and care for this body that God created and gave to me…I am living in disobedience. Really sobering thought…puts that extra serving of chips into place.

When I sat down to write this post last week I just couldn’t find anything to say. I have no words of wisdom or help for emotional eating. I struggle with it so much! The book Made To Crave by Lisa TerKeurst helped me to uncover why I struggle with emotional eating. I could honestly go through the book again…I think it would help. (All of my posts about the book and what I learned about emotional eating are under the Healthy Living menu at the top and then just click on the Made To Crave sub-heading…you’ll learn more about me than you ever wanted to know.) Knowing why I am an emotional eater has helped me to get it a bit under control. But on weak, hard days I feel helpless. Anxiety and stress are the hardest for me to handle. Especially if the stress comes from feeling judged by the people around me…people I love. I just crumble. Sometimes I get anxious and feel like the worst wife and mother ever created. I know this fact isn’t true but feelings are often irrational and not based on truth. Only dependence on God has carried me through those times…

Some days I can beat these feelings. Now that I understand why I succumb to emotional eating it isn’t as hard for me to deal with intellectually. The emotions are still there…the wound is forever a part of me but it no longer owns me. I’ve noticed that if I make my priority on prayer and seeking time with Jesus then I am stronger. However, if I let other things (even good things) take priority over my relationship with the Holy Trinity then I fail in all things including emotional eating. I admit that I haven’t been faithful lately to prayer and seeking Him everywhere. So much pulls at me but the past few weeks I have been making changes to my schedule. Time in prayer and with Jesus is my priority and still everything that is important manages to get done. I have a greater peace in my responsibilities as a wife, home maker and homeschooling mother.

Clarity is a better word. I have clarity. I listen to the Spirit and know what to let go and just…be. Well, sometime anyway.

I’m down three pounds so far this month. I won’t make my five-pound goal and I’m okay with it. Next month will be better but I will continue. I’ve added a few new workouts to my playlist on YouTube. My favorite workouts are from FitnessBlender and jessicasmithtv.